bitter has returned!

I think I have finally found something to be truly bitter about. My health or my current poor health. What's the saying, if you don't have you're health,blah blah blah. So totally true. Just to be bitter I'm going to blame it on work. Yes, I know it can be a number of factors but I'm going to say work and I can trace it back.

It started back in late June 2008. What seemed like a minor bump to the side of my head, turned into months of misery, well with a few good concerts thrown in. I bumped into a pipe, plumbing type that for some reason some dumbass felt it would add some interest to the office in the form of a clothes rack hanging down from the ceiling. Perhaps not put it at eye level especially when most of the losers working there are my height or shorter. Like I said, the bump seemed fairly harmless except later in the day I started feeling nauseous. I ended up missing the next day at work, but only the one day. It was a busy time so I had alot of work. But the feeling that my head was in vice continued for almost 2 months. So basically those beautiful summer months of July and August were spent in doors, mainly from lack of energy, not wanting to cause any further injury, shunning any fun. I did nothing really, no roller blading, fireworks, outings, except for a concert or two I had to go to. I call 2008 my 80's revival /hasbeen year of concerts.
I started feeling better but by october I was hit with panic attacks. I had no idea what was going on - why was this happening. The first happened when I was in line at a Winners store. It happened while I was driving to work and stuck it traffic - so bad I almost wanted to drive off the road on to the sidewalk just to get out of the situation. They still continue today but I have learned to control that urge to escape sort of. But a month ago I bumped my head again. Again did not think much of it, bumped it on the freezer door. But the next day I felt awful and ended up taking 3 days off work. Slowly I started feeling better, and was able to get in some slow walks. I used to be such a fast walker, now i'm lucky if I'm going faster than a mile an hour. But last Thursday the started fixing the roof at work. 8 hours of banging, scraping, horrible, like having a bowing alley on top of my head. I started feeling nauseous again. So I took Friday off and sat at home trying not to vomit. Did the same yesterday too. And here I sit today, trying not to feel sorry for myself that I've missed another beautiful fall day sitting at home trying not to be bitter and trying to get over this awful feeling.

In the words of Yoda, BITTER, I AM!

But I hope my health returns and that I'm up and about again enjoying both sunshine and rain! I'll take anything now just to have a day when I feel like myself again, which well would be bitter.