confessions of a reality tv show junky

I think I may have hit an all time low in my reality show junkyism. I thought it was bad when I watched, I think it was called paradise island or hotel?? One of my sisters told me it was good and I stupidly I listened and watched and well I’m embarrassed for myself admitting to this!
But, I really liked this show! My new fave celebrity reality show which ended this past Sunday, started off for me as a mild curiosity and became a Sunday afternoon must. What is it you ask?

CONFESSIONS OF A TEEN IDOL.

I like to spend Sunday mornings, especially if I don’t have any commitments, by sleeping in til 9am. I wake up, leisurely read the Sunday paper whilst eating some breakfast, watch sponge bob at 10am and after that flip channels until I come across something good, or weirdly interesting. This show would fall into the latter. For the past few weeks, I’ve tried to catch the 7 episodes that were made. I seemed to catch the same repeats or the shows out of sequence. So desperate was I too figure out what had happened I even googled the show to read recaps of each episode! I know what you’re thinking, this girl needs a life and why, why is she watching this show?

I have asked myself the same question. Why do I even care about these so called, teen idols??? I never liked any of them back in their hey day and 2 of them I never even heard of until I watched the show. Seriously people, have you wondered what Billy Hufsey’s been up to over the past 30 years? He was on Fame. Or Chris Atkins, he of the loin cloth and bad acting from that classic, Blue Lagoon – by bad acting I’m not only referring to Brooke Shields, who I feel over the years has proven herself as a true iconic actress. (please note the sarcasm in that sentence) I know you’ve seen Blue Lagoon – anyone over the age of 35 has seen that cinematic masterpiece! Or how about, hmm, Adrian Zmed! Missing him are we? Or how about Jamie Walters? If you ever watched the original 90210 and not that crap show that’s on now, you would remember him as Donna’s abuser! The rest of the cast is made up of a guy name David who was on Baywatch, another guy named Jeremy Jackson, also of Baywatch and some dude name Eric who was on the real world. Not only do you get all this glorious teen idoldom, the show is hosted by none other than Scott Baio and Jason Hervey- 2 forgotten teen idols that should have remained forgotten and for some reason, aren’t one of the guys in the house. I think the term “teen idol” was used rather loosely to describe some of these dudes! The concept- throw seven has beens, I mean former teen idols into a mock up house which is actually a studio warehouse, put the cameras on them and see what happens.

But as I grew more invested (many wasted Sunday afternoons) in trying to figure out what had happened to these guys, I actually grew to liking them and actually hoping for their big break to appear, and for them to re-attain the celebrity status, perhaps not in the crazy teen idol status way, they once had. I really wanted Billy to get his music back on track and on the radio and for him to get that one acting job that would be a catalyst for his comeback. For Chris, who really isn’t that much older than say Brad Pitt, to regain his leading man status. And Adrian, whom I used to think, was soooo cheesy back in his TJ Hooker/Grease 2 days, but who now seemed like such a genuinely nice family guy on the show, that if he were ever to reappear on the small screen I would watch just to support and root him on! The other guys, well, honestly, I never cared then and still don’t now. Sorry! Really I am.

What I liked about the show is the producers didn’t make the guys look stupid or exploit the whole situation like say the Surreal World did to those desperate “celebrities”. Yes, I admit I did catch a season of that show (hours of my life I will never get back!). I think Confessions of a Teen Idol was a great forum for these former idols, as they each supported each other and came to believe in themselves again. They were given daily group therapy support sessions, different career building sessions and help to get them back on track if fame and celebrity was something they wanted again. You see, back in their hey day, some of them walked away from it all, while others had no choice, as in don’t- call -us, we’ll- call- you, adios, and buh bye. In the end, they all realized that yes, they did want that taste of fame again and for those select few, I hope they regain it! Everyone, well almost everyone, deserves a second chance – just don’t screw it up or take it for granted. As we know, fame is fleeting.

I would love to see another season of this show with some other forgotten teen idols. Imagine, throwing in a room, Leif Garrett! Or how about Rex Smith?? Haha. Who’s another one, Johnny Whittaker – remember him??? (please note- I never had crushes on any of these guys- I just couldn’t think of anyone who would apply to this category,ho hasn’t already been on some “Where are they now? “ type show)
Unfortunately a lot of these former teen idols have tried reigniting their careers by showing up on some really bad, bad reality shows. Do I need to say the surreal life again, or how about celebrity wrestling, or was it boxing or figure skating? Oh, the worst, “Help, I’m a celebrity-get me out of here!” The exception would have to be Dancing with the Stars – this I have to leave for its very own entry in BeeBitter! Haha.

Anyway, re-runs of Confession of a Teen Idol are still showing on Muchmoremusic in Canada. I’m sure if you catch one episode, you may find yourself wondering like I did, why isn’t Christopher Atkins in the limelight anymore? But if you’re really smart, turn the TV off and do something else! Anything else.

funny little tune

The other day I was humming a little tune in my head. It made me smile and I thought, geez, I should make this my little life anthem. You know those days when you’re feeling down, but if you think of something happy, it changes you’re mood?
Well, this is what I’m going to do! I know, maybe I should just create my own little tune but why not steal it off the internet if you can?

Next time I get cut off by some lunatic driver- I’ll sing this tune!
Didn’t win the lottery – I’ll sing this tune!
Watching Lost driving me crazy – sing the tune!

Has beebitter turned a new leaf?? maybe! maybe not!

I had no idea Paul Williams wrote this -


("Love is All Around" by Paul Williams) - Mary Tyler Moore Show Lyrics


Who can turn the world on with her smile?
Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?
Well it's you girl, and you should know it
With each glance and every little movement you show it

Love is all around, no need to waste it
You can have a town, why don't you take it
You're gonna make it after all
You're gonna make it after all


How will you make it on your own?
This world is awfully big, girl this time you're all alone
But it's time you started living
It's time you let someone else do some giving

Love is all around, no need to waste it
You can have a town, why don't you take it
You're gonna make it after all
You're gonna make it after all

like, huh?

There is what I would consider a dumbfounding illness that is afflicting women. It’s been happening for a few years now. No one knows where it began, how it spread, or how to eradicate it. What is this swift moving illness you ask? Well, I’ll tell you – it is an illness that effects one’s voice. It causes the bimbo voice or what I like to refer to as the question? voice? And it’s irritating as hell.

How this affliction works is it makes every sentence spoken sound like a question. Whole soliloquies can be spoken that leave the listener wondering, was that a question? Should I nod my head in agreement or disagreement? Should I respond here??

I first noticed this strange thing a few years back. I remember it clearly, or should I say I recall hearing it clearly. I was downtown purchasing a scarf. I stood at the cash desk as the clerk rang in my purchase. As she handed me my receipt and scarf, she cocked her head to one side and all wide eyed and perky said to me,
“If you need to return this (?), you have to make sure you have the receipt (?) because if you don’t (?) you won’t be able to (?)”.
Now to grasp the whole magnitude of having to hear someone speak like this, you have to read that sentence with a wide eyed expression and say it with a slight valley girl, drawn out twang. At any pause or end of your sentence your voice needs to go up an octive at the end as if you’re asking a question, but you’re not; you’re only making a statement. Call me; I’ll do an impression for you.
I so wanted to respond to her by saying,
“you mean (?) if I don’t have a receipt (?) like I can’t return it (?), oh that’s not good (?)”.
Now if you are a regular reader of Beebitter, and I know there are at least 2 of you out there, you may know that I love to mimic voices, especially strange ones. But I held my tongue, and instead stared at her with a look that must have said, did I hear what I think I just heard look on my face, at least I imagine I did. After I recovered and shook my head back to reality, I said thanks, and walked out of the store with my sister. As we were safely outside, my sister and I looked at each with the expressions that read, was that for real? We were both slightly shocked but amused and it didn’t stop me from imitating this girl for the rest of the day, and even now!

But like I said, this affliction has now spread! It seems not only to have infected a majority of women in their 20’s, but is now infecting women in their 30’s and even 40’s! You can hear it everywhere! As you walk down the street and 2 young things talking to each other on their cell phones pass you, as you sit in a restaurant, in every retail store on Robson Street! How do we stop this??? That by the way was an actual question.

Is RuPaul correct in saying the other day as he was hen pecked by the women of The View that the era of the Bimbo is gone? I would have to disagree with him and he himself would have to agree with me if he heard these women try to speak! The bimbo voice/question? voice exists in full force in these young women. I’m not necessary saying these women are bimbos, but they sound, well, stupid! But I am sure these are intelligent, well educated women who may one day, quite possibly be the future leaders, CEO’s, power women of the world! All of a sudden Sarah Palin comes to mind. yikes! And like can you imagine (?) like what a conversation (?) between 2 of these future power bitches (?) would like, sound like (?). Because, I think like (?) I would be glad (?) that when that day arrives (?) I’ll be like old (?) and my hearing will be like gone (?) cause like, I would like, kill myself (?) or pour hot oil into my eardrums!

Join me in finding a cure! Just don’t ask me any questions about how to do it (?)

I'm no fashionista but...

Thought I’d write down some of my favorite fashion faux pas’. And I’m not saying that these are necessarily DON’TS, especially if you look like this,hahah! , maybe just don’t be looking like this if you cross my path. I’m no fashionista –I own 2 pair of crocs and wear them proudly, but I don’t spend all my money on the latest whatever trying to look like I walked off the runway. I think if you keep it classic and comfortable, follow the trends that suit you, that’s the best.. I wear a uniform of jeans and a black top to work almost every day. Surprisingly no one at work ever comments on this, then again I work with mostly men and what do they care?? The worst thing in dressing is feeling uncomfortable, like the clothes are wearing you! And the other worst thing, is dressing for other people – projecting an image of the skanky ho, rich bitch, slacker, or trend slave when you aren’t. But even if you are a skanky ho, rich bitch, etc, does everyone need to know?

But here I go with things I hate to see:

1) High waisted jeans with the tapered peg legs. I remember selling these at the gap, the “reverse fit”. Sorry ladies, these went out in the 90’s. If you still own a pair, please, please just donate them or better yet just burn them. You don’t have to spend a fortune on a nice pair of jeans that can actually flatter your figure. Why do you want to look like that?? I saw an offender the other day. To make the look complete, she wore a white turtleneck, tucked in no less, round glasses and her hair tied back in a pony tale. Where do I begin?
2) So going back to jeans, ladies, please don’t wear heels and have your jeans not reach the floor. Geez, look, if the jeans are grazing your ankle, even when you’re only wearing a 2 inch heal – it looks bad. The only time this will work is if you’re wearing a skinny jean and in that case wear them with a boot. If it’s a straight leg, bootcut, flare and too short to wear with a heel wear a nice funky sneaker than. And please do not wear running shoes! I’m talking about any shoe you would wear for any physical activity. They do sell sneakers that are strictly for looking good.
3) Running shoes worn with a nice work outfit. I know, you’re trying to be comfortable and walk to work. Fine, but do you need to wear the shabby trench coat with it? You’ve seen these women, all heading downtown for their office jobs. This I do have to say is a DON’T!
4) Any person who works in a bank. They always look horrible. Don’t believe, go into an actual bank one day and check out those tellers. I really can’t say anymore.
5) Cougar looks. These are the women who have the heels, the too tight jeans, the skanky leopard print top, the over processed hair, the pound of makeup on their face, the fake tan, the jewelry and designer handbag in one hand and the bedazzled cell phone in the other. You know, this look can work, but these women are just over the top. The scary thing is these women aren’t just the 40 something’s anymore desperately holding on to their youth, they’re young woman trying to look older too!
6) I actually saw this the other day. Woman in drapey kimono like dress, black /grey, over leggings, wearing a red turban on her head. I wish I had my camera. What the hell was that?!!
7) Anyone who wears head to toe Lululemon
8) Hate to say this, but the Japanese girls who come here to learn English but are actually her to pick up white guys and shack up with them until the get their immigration card and don’t say that’s not true because I know of several cases and anyway these girls wear hello kitty outfits and high heals that they can’t walk in properly because they are slightly pigeon toed and they look like the cougars I write about in pt 5.
9) Guys who wear track suits. Doesn’t matter what kind. Generally standing around looking somewhat nervous, possibly smoking, chunky gold chain around neck, over groomed eyebrows. Do they actually think they look good???

That’s all for now! Next time I’ll try to have some accompanying photos so you’ll get the whole visual. And remember, always look in a full length mirror before you leave the house – or just ask me first.

I broke a nail the other day

I broke a nail the other day trying to avoid touching the door handle leading out of one of those washrooms where you try your best not to touch anything with your bare hands, or butt. I tried using just the tip of my finger but the door was too heavy and thus, broken nail. Overall the washroom was kept clean, but because of the location of this particular washroom, inside a sad mall at the edge of the down town eastside, sometimes you can find some, lets say, lost souls in there. And I don’t just mean the homeless women, prostitutes or drug addicts that may visit. I mean the graffiti artists who do their eloquent work on the walls of these said stalls. Where’d they all go?
Why do I call them lost souls? I call them lost souls not only because you just don’t find that much graffiti on the walls anymore, thus becoming surely a dieing if not lost art form, but because these souls to me seemed lost. They seem lost, so desperate that the only way to get help or relief from their miseries or painful self awareness, is to get their message out, to release their angst or anger onto that washroom stall wall or door -messages for the masses. Or at least those willing to use the stall. After all, they do have your undivided attention when you’re in there.

There was a time I would wonder, why the hell do people write on these walls, or any wall for that matter? But now I wonder what happened to all these word smiths and their declarations of “I was here”, or “east van rules” so nicely designed to fit into its cross, or that unreadable %&# scribbled tag I used to see all over town? Or even better, the stories of broken hearts, crappy song lyrics reflecting one’s broken heart, or the cursing angry rants directed at the whore who stole your boyfriend thus causing your broken heart ramblings, or the best yet the rant about you’re cheating loser ex-boyfriend, the said stolen boyfriend?? I miss reading these!

I’ll tell you where these lost souls and their desperate rants, raves and declarations have gone!
Here. On the internet. Blogging away. I am here now! But if they’re anything like me, their audience consists of a few family and friends, or some poor Joe who googled you by mistake. (Hi Joe!)
So I say to all those former washroom stall graffiti artists, nay superstar wordsmiths, get back to doing all your ranting, bitching, declaring your love/hate for whomever on those stall doors and walls! Give your audience something to read again while they’re doing their business in there! Because when you gotta go, you gotta go, and into that stall, no matter how icky, we’ll be, and we’ll read and wonder, why???